Change is inevitable, but when is it too much?

Eww ... I'm having a bitter moment.

I like change. Flavors of lunch meat, cheese, cereal ... change it up! Sunny days, cloudy days, warm days and cool days ... change it up! It's sometimes addicting for me, I think, since I get bored easily. I excel at change management too. But I wasn't particularly in the mood for a big life change in 2013.


In January 2011, I started a new job with a new company, got married and went on vacation all in the same month. Later that year, my organization switched it up internally and I found myself with another new job. In early 2012 I learned I was pregnant and by the end of the year I was blessed with a baby boy.

I was looking forward to settling into my new life with a son in 2013. I had been back to work from maternity leave a mere two weeks when I was sent packing for good. I was looking forward to slowly getting back into the groove of what I knew well every day at work and blending that with my new role as a mom. I wasn't ready to be tossed into a volatile job market forced to find a new career in order to survive.

I am changed-out.

Resilience

Most people have told me they are impressed with how positively I am handling this most current life-changing event. I feel like I have no other choice. But today I got a heavy dose of the reality I'm living, and it instantly threw me into a funk. I knew there would be hard days, and I prepared myself for them, just like I mentally prepared myself with losing my job. But it is tough.

The thought that the only way to get from where I was to where I need to be is through experiencing more change is exhausting. I will get a new job. That is change. I will have a new routine. That is change. I will have to learn new skills. More change.

Change change change change change.

Bleh.

I know I have to be resilient because my family needs me, and I could never settle with failure. So I decided to vent about it in a blog, so I can move on from these miserable feelings I have today. I recognize this is one of the hardest things I've had to deal with ... ever. But as I sit here with my baby boy sound asleep on my chest and the bright sun filtering in through the curtains to my home office space, I also recognize I'm still rich in so many ways that money would NEVER be able to buy.

So to cheer myself up today, I shall request a hug from my husband, stuff myself silly for dinner and watch movies about down and out women who overcome life's biggest obstacles to achieve their dreams.

Any movie recommendations?!